Friday, October 3, 2008

Diagnoses and such...

So, we went on Thursday to find out the results from the Child Diagnostic clinic. They diagnosed him with Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD), ADHD, ODD, a sensory disorder, visual processing problems, etc., etc., etc. A few years back we thought he had some attachment disorders because Bradley and I have a much more "distant" relationship, which is a symptom of RAD. It felt good to know that it was one of those diagnoses that Jason and I thought of a while back...too bad we didn't push any more on it. We feel that we lost 6 years of trying to help Bradley. The Dr. did say that he was on the mild side of it, but it is still there. Bradley has some symptoms of a whole bunch of different problems...Autism, FAS, etc., or at least we thought. The Dr. wants us to see Michael Trout here in town, he is the expert on RAD and she really thinks that he can help Bradley a lot. I called his office today, however he is in Canada at a speaking event...figures...doesn't he realize WE need him. We also have to get him into some social skills groups, there is a therapist here in town that works with children with Autism. Bradley and children with Autism have a lot of social skills deficits that are VERY similar and the Dr. thought that Bradley could benefit with those social skills groups with those children. We got a lot of info from the Dr., we went and bought "Transforming the difficult child: The nurtured heart approach", I checked out a book from the library by Daniel Hughes (who is another expert on the disorder), we are READY. A lot of the actual treatment will be Jason and I's approach on everything, how we talk to him, how we discipline him, behavior plans for school and home, making sure our families know how to treat him, what to do for him when his anxiety starts and how to handle that, etc. I know I have put a lot of etc. in this is because there is so much and it will be hard. He won't be "healthy" tomorrow, next week, next may take years, and it will probably be something he/we work on for his entire life. Jason and I just want Bradley to succeed in any way he wants and be a successful part of the community. If anyone has any info or ANYTHING about RAD, our ears are open...we are ready to change.

So, everything else in our life is good. Went down to Tuscola to shop, Becca got sick all over Old Navy's floor, and we came home and had to take Grace home (she was suppose to spend the night). Bradley went to the U of I volleyball game with Belinda and had a really good time.
James has cute all 4 two year wonder he has been fussy, not wanting to eat, etc.

Jason and I are emotionally drained. I know we wanted to know what was wrong with Bradley, but now knowing it infuriates me. I cried most of Thursday on and off between grief and just being pissed off at his parents...I HATE them!!! I know hate is a terrible word and I would never want my kids to use it or whatever, but his parents did this to him. They abused, neglected their own child, how do people do that to their own flesh and blood?? I know "grief" sounds weird, but a part of Bradley is missing, possibly forever...will he ever be able to look at me, hug me, kiss me, love me on his own?? He has never once came up to me and hugged me, kissed me, etc. He is my son, I love him (sometimes "conditionally" and I am working on that), but I do love him... I said if anyone knows anything...PLEASE let me know. Gotta get some sleep, unfortunately I have to work AGAIN tomorrow.

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