Monday, December 1, 2008

Thankmas with the O'Connors

So...we made it through the weekend...almost uneventful. For those of you reading this that don't know the whole story...I'll give you the short we go:

3 years ago (this new years eve) my 27 year old, recently divorced, with 2 kids, alcoholic cousin "hooked up" with my 18 year old (still in high school) sister in law, in my basement at our new years eve party (Jason and I were NOT OK with any of this, by the way). 3 months later, during her Spring Break they went to the courthouse and got married, and hid it from both families. I had run into his ex-wife and she said "Congrats" to me...I didn't know what she was talking about, but she filled me in and I called Jason and told him, he called his parents...finally the truth (or what Laura wanted to tell) was out. She just had a baby 5 months now I have a new cousin or niece, or what is she really to me?? Over the last 3 years, it comes to our attention that not a whole lot of "truth" comes out of either of their mouths...they are both VERY manipulative, lie CONSTANTLY and make up stories about things that aren't even worth making up stories about. It has caused a HUGE problem with our relationship with Jason's family. So...much more underneath all of this...but you get the idea...

Well, Laura and I talked on the phone the week before "Thankmas", she had called to say "I'm sorry for hurting you". I said it was a nice gesture, but "I'm sorry" is not going to take away all of the crap that had been said/done for the last 3 years. At the beginning of this whole mess, we did not want our kids involved in this whole screwed up mess and I asked Laura not to say anything to either of our kids, however she totally disrespected me and one time with Bradley (he was 11 at the time), told him everything about them getting married, I about flipped out...I was VERY pissed off. Well, on the phone when she called she said "you were right, I was just telling Bradley because my mom told me I should tell him the truth" an 11 year old (that in all actuality has an intellectual understanding of probably an 8 or 9 year old if that)...COME ON...GET REAL. It was about a 45 minute conversation that did not end how she wanted, but at least I got to tell her how I feel (again), and we hung up. All of this "I'm sorry" crap started because we are not going up for Christmas this year. I am working/traveling for 6 weekends in a row and the weekend after Christmas is the only weekend we have NOTHING to do...we are staying home. I know they don't believe me, but I was planning on staying home WAY before they called to say that was the weekend they were doing xmas.

So...Saturday night we were up there and Melissa (sister in law) and I left with the 2 little ones to go back to their house, the kids were tired and I was ready to go, but everything seemed as OK as one could want with our backgrounds. Well, Jason went downstairs to talk to his other brother and Laura plopped her baby on Bradley's lap and said "Smile so Grandma can get a picture". I had already told her that I was not taking any pictures with her baby, but if Jason wanted to that JASON could. Laura and her mom TOTALLY disrespected me AGAIN. They didn't do it when I was there, they didn't ask for all grandkids to get a picture, there was NO need for this picture to be taken. I am SO PISSED off about this, it is so unbelievable. I hope that picture was worth everything to them, because I told Jason (and he agreed) that the bridges have burnt and there is NO rebuilding. They have never asked how we feel, they never ask when it's a good time for us (everything and all dates revolve around when Andy has his other 2 kids), they never ask about when Laura tells them something if it's the truth (Laura tells her mom that the Wilson side of the family is coming to their house...they were not invited to their house...come on...I AM ON THE WILSON SIDE). It always revolves around Laura. Jason is their first born, and he/we have been on the "shit" side for the last 3 years. I can count on my fingers how many times my kids have seen his it sad?...YES. I feel bad, but until they can respect me, understand my feelings, etc...we will have nothing more to do with them. She wants my kids to call their cousin Andy...Uncle Andy. She wants her "step" kids to call us Aunt and Uncle...we are their cousins...have been for their whole lives. She doesn't get how "Jerry Springer" this whole problem is...come on...doesn't this happen in Kentucky???

There is a lot more to this whole issue, but I don't think my fingers would hold up to type the whole thing. :) Just another bummer weekend that we both thought was actually OK until Bradley said that Aunt Laura made him hold the baby. The O'Connors want things back the way they's not going to happen. Accept what is there and Respect our morals and values and how we want to raise our children and our feelings about the whole thing. It hasn't been done for 3 years...why start now?? It is a SAD situation...who knows how it will turn out...we'll see.

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